A Sensory Map

This post is inspired by Poets and Writers‘ online “The Time is Now” creative nonfiction prompt for last week:

“This week, write a map leading to where you live. Start as close or far from your home as you wish and trace the paths, obstacles, and landmarks that lead you to your door. Think about who you’re creating this map for and when they would have an occasion to use it. How would you describe the geography of your neighborhood to someone who’s never been there? Consider the elements that are special to you and make where you live feel like home.”

Instead of writing the map leading to where I live, I want to write a map of sorts from where I live.

The first step to getting out of the door is making sure that I have everything that I need. Then I say goodbye to Belle, my cat and my roommate if she’s there.

While closing the door, I am aware of the red and white “Welcome” mat often gets stuck. It doesn’t this time. Once I lock our light green door, I am in the hallway.

And in the hallway, my senses are flooded. I see how the lights make everything slightly yellow, I smell the Indian food that seems to perpetually come from my neighbors around the corner, I hear the dogs from across the way barking and their owner yelling at them, I feel my knees bending as I walk down the steps, and through my shoes, I feel when the carpet ends and turns into tile as I approach the front door with its cold, black, metal handle.

I don’t always have time to appreciate my view, but sometimes I stop to consider. Directly in front of me and to the east is another building, its yellow paint cheerily echoing the paint on my own, and two trees flanking the sidewalk that leads to the parking lot. I know that the mountains are behind me, but I don’t see them. I just have faith that they are there because I saw them when I woke up in the morning.

To the south is the path to the shopping center where I go to lunch sometimes. That path also leads into a much longer trail by a creek. This path has a good view of  various roads. The highway and the train disappear before reappearing, but the mountains and the creek are always consistent.

To the north is usually where my car is, parked wherever I could find a spot the last time I drove. I walk in the grass to get to my dark green vehicle. In the winter, it is haggard looking when it is seen. When snow is covering the ground, I delight in the crunching sound my shoes make even while I’m dreading the possibility of scraping ice off my windows. Right now, in late spring, I enjoy trudging through the green grass, which is usually wet from the rain Colorado has been getting lately or from the sprinklers.

I temporarily forget about my surroundings as I sit in the car, turn it on, and select my music. But as I reverse out of my space, I look to the north, take a breath, and feel right at home because no matter what direction I’m facing, no matter what the weather is, I know where the mountains are.

Creeds

This is taken from a journal entry that I wrote while I was listening to Contemporary Christian music. I wish I remember what songs I was listening to in particular, but c’est la vie… Looking back through my journal, it touched me. I hope it touches you too.


I believe in God. I believe in truth. I believe in justice. I believe in life and death, but not in dying prematurely. I believe in fellowship, but not conversion. I believe in free will. I believe that we should touch souls, but not control them. I believe in the silence and the quiet noise. I believe in harmony and human beings. I believe in flowers and soot. I believe in faith in times of shaking foundations. I believe in the phoenix.

Ad majorem Dei gloriam

We dedicated all our thoughts, words, and actions to the greater glory of God.

Wordlist

majesty

praise

refuge

name

You know all of our names, the name of the stars, the name of the sheep. The name of the lost and the found. Our brain holds onto your name for a second and then it disappears. Oh that we could hold onto your name, your beautiful name. For ever.

Wordlist

whisper

you break me

speak

Who am I?

Who am I to speak? A different question than “Who am I?” How do I dare? How dare I? How do I even dare to lift my eyes to the heavens. I am a pebble compared to the glories of heaven and the grace that you repeatedly have showed me. Showed me? You have touched me. You have built and taken down icicles on balconies. I squint and I see your sunlight and I am honored beyond knowledge and speech.

I am thankful for my feet on the ground, even if they are not employed by dancing. I will forever be dancing.

See ye first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, then all the doors shall be opened unto you. Hallelu Hallelujah.

I believe in crying silently alone. I believe in weeping with others. I believe in letting the tears glint in the sunrise of your glory.

 

For my mother

I almost wrote a post about my cat, but then I decided that I would rather write it on someone infinitely more special to my heart (sorry Belle, I love you too).

Some memories of my mother:

1. Sitting on her lap in the rocking chair. She sang a song of her own making to the tune of “Rainbow Connection.”

2. Tucking me into bed at night. I would “hide” under the covers so she wouldn’t find me.

3. Going home after my first year of college and sitting with her on the couch, the cats crawling all over us.

4. A sick day. We drank tea and watched “Sweet Home Alabama.”

5. Driving to dance and discussing Harry Potter.

6. Working out at the gym. We would wake ourselves up by listening to “I’ll Make a Man Out of You” and “You Can’t Stop the Beat.”

7. Going on retreat. Beforehand, we ate lunch and got pedicures.

8. Laying my head on her lap, listening to her stomach gurgle and enjoying the feeling of a light hand through my hair.

9. Settling down on the couch for a nap and her wrapping a blanket around me.

10. Calling her and hearing a perky “Hello!”

I know this is rather short post, but often the smallest amount of words convey the most meaning and the most love.

I love you so much Mom! Thank you for being there!

Now I should get back to writing this paper…